Maladict

[Voting took place here. I apologize for my having been topped by formatting in my original app.]

Character: Maladict
Series: Discworld by Terry Pratchett (specifically, Monstrous Regiment)
Age: appears to be about 18 (His age is not given in the book, but Maladict
is part of a group of soldiers aged approximately 15 to
19, and his age is never pointed out as something exceptional.)

Canon: At first glance, the corporal of the so-called "Monstrous Regiment" of
the tiny, pugnacious and generally backwards nation of Borogravia’s run-
down army doesn’t appear very threatening. Not especially tall, rather slim,
dressed like a gentleman, pale of skin. Actually, very pale of skin. And then
there are the very pointy teeth.

Maladict is a vampire, possibly the most badass race in all of Discworld. In
fact, Maladict is so badass, it can begin to get a little annoying (nothing is
more irritating than when a person is always so superior acting and you can’t
call them on it because they pretty much are superior), until you get to know
him a little better. Despite his effortlessly cool style, he actually has a pretty
warm personality. (He also is not without his weaknesses.) He’s intelligent,
sarcastic, unable to keep from mouthing off and possessing of a rather morbid
sense of humour. And while he is a member of the League of Temperance
(members have sworn off the drinking of human blood; motto: "Not One
Drop"), he has not the slightest qualm over threatening to open a can of
vampiric whup-ass on someone for some reason (such as, say, getting served
better beer) with the very real ability and intention to follow through on that
threat.

A final word of warning: when he says "I’d kill for a cup of coffee," unless you
don’t mind having him putting a serious damper on your social life - and all
other aspects of your life, actually, biological aspect included - you might
want to dig out the Folgers for him mighty quick.

SPOILER BUT KINDA SORTA AN IMPORTANT THING AT LEAST FOR
SOME PEOPLE HERE

( SPOILER )

Good day to all!

Despite the lively zombie infestation from which this place is
suffering - honestly, I have never seen so many lurching about at
once, let alone performing organised sacrificial rituals (are they
really necessary? I know many who would have liked to have eaten that goat)
- I am sure that you are all civilized and decent individuals, and that
creating and maintaining friendly relations would be in the
best interests of all of us, wouldn’t you agree? After all, what’s
the sense of unnecessary antagonism when at war? I’m sure that
someone I know will attempt - or has attempted - to kill someone you know
at some point in time, or vice versa, but let us live in
the moment, hm? Yes, I’m glad that you think so, too.

So in the interest of nurturing these beautiful relationships of
ours, I humbly request that you either release my compatriots
from wherever you are holding them or provide me with
information regarding their whereabouts. You appear to be
civilians, so you could not be holding them as prisoners of war.
As such, if you are planning to hand them over to the Alliance -
well, I am positive that such wonderful and intelligent people as
yourselves wouldn’t think of doing such a thing.

Oh, and you’ve probably spotted that I’m a Black Ribboner. I
assure you, I hold strictly to the motto of the League - not one
drop of human blood for me! I hope that you are tolerant people
who will accept that a vampire can make such a change in his life.
Tolerance is an excellent thing. For instance, when I was walking
through the woods, I was confronted by a large purple creature. It
attempted to show me some form of affection, which, I regret to
say, I did not tolerate. However, he proved to be a better man
(figuratively speaking, of course, as I have yet to see a man that
hairy, and that’s including werewolves) than me, as he so
graciously tolerated my ripping his head off! I strive to achieve
such tolerance in my life!

So! If you will lead me to my comrades, that will be much
appreciated.

Also, provide me with coffee. I know it is here. Someone spill
the beans.

---

There were also a few semi-lengthy comments written to convince wibblers. ^_^

To blackandwhiteox, who asked what kind of crack Mal would bring to camp:

Because camp is, well, camp, my goal is to base the crack in personality rather than, uh, biological make-up, etc., because in camp, things like that are always a-changin'. Plus, many of the campers come from extreme settings, so what might be a big deal in one world is nothing special in another.

Personality-wise, Maladict is, mm, I hesitate to say big with the male posturing, because it isn't overwhelming, but it's definitely a constant factor. While he'll respect a hierarchy that he's voluntarily put himself into, he'll definitely poke at his superiors if he feels they're incompetant and he'll also attempt to establish himself in an uncle/big brother role among his peers, which I can see as both making him some friends and grating on some nerves (yay, conflict!).

Vampires are arrogant, even if it isn't explicit. He doesn't feel the need to assert his superiority constantly, because he's confident that he simply is one of the big fish in the lake pond. Or, rather, was, back in Discworld. That worldview might be shaken up some here.

His sense of humour, as mentioned, is a little black. To paraphrase, OOCly (don't have the book on hand *fails*): "This is so amusing! You know how they tell the underlings to 'eat the documents if you've been captured' so that it doesn't fall into enemy hands? Well -- ahaha! -- I guess they don't tell them that they're also making sure that you don't fall into enemy hands! That must be a droll little surprise! Poisoned documents! Check out the frothing at the mouth!" He's not especially malicious or cruel, just... a tad twisted at times.

However, there is also considerable crack regarding simply what he is. He might have given up drinking b- bl- blaaa- blood (please don't ask him to say the word too much!), but he still sleeps hanging upside-down. In a fight, for all of his physical skills, the person who could probably take him out most quickly would be Akiha (or anyone else with a camera) -- one flash, and you have a pile of Maladict-dust on the ground.

And I cannot overemphasize his coffee addiction. It's hardcore. He'll begin hallucinating if he's gone for too long without coffee. And vampire hallucinations are contagious, so. In addition to hallucinations, there's also just general crazy involved.

Overall, he's pretty amiable -- not too much of a spaz, not overly antagonistic. Still, for all of his competance, he sometimes bites off more than he can chew, and he definitely can rub people the wrong way.

Plus, I think he'd really like Snarky Bitch Day.

...also ended up convincing marezydoats with that. ^_^

For baby_endless, who, seeing Mal as sleeker than he came across in the app, asked to be poked for a re-vote:

Hello. ^_^

Yeah, the sleekness turned out to be a problem that I hadn't been expecting when I first got the idea. XD I'm new to this heavily dialogue-based style of RPing, which makes characters whom I picture as being quite physical sort of hard.

The weird part about doing a sample "intro" for Mal is the difference that I see between introductory!Mal and settled-in!Mal. He's smooth, but he's definitely showier and more confrontational when he's "making his entrance," so to speak. I was aiming for a level of macho showcasing similar to when he's, ah, beer bargaining with One Eyebrow in the beginning, but with the added edge of coffee deprivation and being deeper into war.

I would have liked for it to be more subtle, but we get a lot of Mal through descriptions of his actions and physicality (which are lost in the form/style of app sample entries) and he does tend to lose the subtle when addressing larger groups (e.g. his address to the captured soldiers, where he basically says "Good evening! Poke me the wrong way, and I'll tear all of your throats out!").

Anything else you'd like to know, just ask. ^_^


And that's that.